Friday, April 5, 2013

The one where mum fills in for me because I am busy and have come up against OBSTACLES.

Mum's written another guest post.
LUCKY because my brand new computer has DIED. DIED I TELL YOU!

Making it once again nearly impossible to get a moment alone with the computer in the study for some one on one action. If you know what I mean.

So excuse me while I go and throw the laptop out the window and kick some kittens...

Hello again, delightful followers of my equally delightful daughter’s blog. Thought you might like an update from the “family compound” as Sarah likes to call it.

Recently I had P over for her first parent-free sleepover. It involved a round-trip to the Gold Coast to pick her up and likewise to take her home but was well worth it for the pleasure of having her all to myself for a little while.

Actually, it took a little courage to take this step. P, although truly the most adorable little girl imaginable, is full on.  You may have gathered this from her Mummy’s blog. She is the Eveready Bunny. She never stops.  And this full-on-ness extends to her sleeping.

Whenever the family is staying at my place, P always sleeps on a mattress in my room, thus giving us the opportunity for cosy Nanny-P time and providing a little respite for the sleep-deprived parents. The mattress is made up with beautiful lavender sheets and doona (P’s most favourite colour). We have all the usual bed-time ritual of story, song and cuddles and she mostly settles down pretty easily.

Well, I say “settles down”. That really isn’t the term to describe P’s sleep. As an experienced Mum, Nanny and wise old crone, I’ve seen a few sleeping children in my time but never, ever, anything to match the wild restlessness that little girl exhibits whilst apparently fast asleep. She thrashes, she yells, she bangs on the wall, she wails, she gets her head out on the floor and her legs up the wall, she burrows head-first under the covers with her bum on the pillow. You may recall she managed to give herself a black eye in her sleep a while back. For anyone who’s seen her in action, that’s easy to believe.

On one visit, exhausted after a day with two little kids, I lay awake till about 4 AM while P went through her gymnastics, shouting and crying, falling out of bed and banging on the wall. At about 4, something changed and she went still and quiet, so of course I finally fell deep asleep. Only to be woken at about 5 AM by P’s indignant voice: “Nanny! Beanie (this is her bed-time doll) can’t sleep from your snoring!” And with that, the day began.

So it was with a bit of trepidation that I undertook this solo mission. However, in the event, all went incredibly well. For a start, P’s beloved cousin A was staying with her grandparents, my brother and sister-in-law, on the same weekend. They live only a few minutes’ drive from my place – a sort of outlier to the family compound. So, on our return from the Gold Coast I drove straight to their place and was then able to sit and chat to my gorgeous niece while the two little girls played dress-ups with my sister-in-law’s clothes and accessories. Peace and harmony reigned.

Later I was entertained by a lively disagreement between the two little girls as to the correct title for my sister-in-law (remember Slapdash Great-Aunt?)
“She’s my Nanna,” insisted A, who can be quite adamant in her opinions.
“She’s my Aunty L,” replied P, whose opinions are also firmly held.
“No, she’s my Nanna!” etc.
This continued for a while until I saw storm-clouds about to burst and tried to calm things down. “Well, you see, A, your Nanna can be P’s Aunty L too. That’s how it works. “
Well, A wasn’t having that. “SHE’S MY NANNA!!!” she yelled in outrage.
“Oh, A,” said P with icy sarcasm. “So, I don’t have any aunties? You have to learn to share your aunties, A!”  Which A promptly agreed to do. Peace again.

Later we took the littlies to the beach where they had a fat old time frolicking in the chilly and rather murky water. Is there anything happier than a kid at the beach? Then back to Slapdash-Great-Aunt and Uncle’s for a hot bath and tea, so that all I had to do was drive P to my place and pour her exhausted little bones into the lavender bed, where – miracle of miracles – she slept quietly and peacefully till 6AM the next morning. Yes!

Ed: Obviously I inherited my mother's EXPERT PHOTOGRAPHY SKILLZZZ

Saturday dawned grey and wet so the early part of the day was spent companionably watching ABC4Kids … ah, I mean, doing craft activities and practising the oboe, Slapdash Mama! Later, Grandpa G came over and took P for a babycino, a clear advantage of the family compound set-up. I didn’t even need to provide lunch as morning tea had evidently been substantial to say the least.

It was time to take the little visitor home. P chattered all the way home about how much she was looking forward to seeing Mummy and Daddy and Mummy and B and Mummy but, of course, was off-hand and lacklustre in her greeting when we finally got there, wounding her poor mother’s tender heart. Dammit!

Anyway, apart from that glitch the sleepover was a success and I’ll certainly do it again some time soon. Maybe for two nights!

 Thanks Mum.

I think you need your own blog! Blogging is the new black don't you know.


  1. Hello mum of NS, when I am sober I fully intend to leave an intelligible comment ...

    1. I don't think mum knows how to respond to comments. I will have to give her a tutorial.

  2. You rock - Slapdash Nana! My mother Nanabulous does not even know that I have a blog. When she finds out she'll no doubt be horrified. On the plus side she'll at least become Fass aware.

    1. Mum is my most regular reader and least frequent commenter. As in she never comments. Being a Luddite and all .

  3. So lovely of you to babysit- you must have been exhausted after all that crafting and oboe playing. x

    1. If I were mum I would aay "yes Helen and thanks for commenting!"

  4. Love the Slapdash Nana posts! Any chance of a night out in Bris Sarah with Slapdash Nana having a whole tribe?
    BYO oboe though.

    1. Ooh good idea K. But I don't think mum would mind me saying she is usually fairly done in just with my two even when I am present let alone with Team Destructo too! But you never know! Haha!

  5. Mothers like you are lifesavers! ( speaking of which, could you please check that your daughter hasn't murdered any innocent kittens).

    1. Sulky when are u doing another blog post? Or have I missed one? Must check..

  6. P's sleep sounds very animated! Great post Slapdash Nanny.
    I hope your computer troubles are fixed soon Sarah, but you have a very good lackie poster there.

    1. Thanks Alicia! Am taking the jolly thing back to shop today. Yes mum is a good locum that's fo sho!

  7. An intrіguing disсussion is definitely worth comment.

    I beliеve that you ought to publіѕh more
    about this tοpіс, it mіght not be a tаboo matter but geneгally
    people don't discuss these issues. To the next! All the best!!

    my web site: Chemietoilette

    1. I stand corrected. THIS is the best spam comment ever. Now excuse me while I click on their link!

  8. I think you have totally found your calling Slapdash Nan xx


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