I'm a pretty lazy person, when all is said and done. Motherhood has challenged my natural lazy instincts like you wouldn't believe. No more lying on the couch for a whole weekend reading. Unfair.
Anyway lazy mothers still have to try and come up with shit to entertain their kids with so I thought I would prepare a series of Lazy Mothering Tips.
Here's the first one.
When the kids are doing your head in, crank up some tunes and dance maniacally at them until they stop whinging. It really freaks them out. I just go for it and pretend it is the year 2000 and I am cutting moves in Super Delux in the Valley. ANyone remember that place? If you ever read this post I wrote a little while ago you will remember that I had years of training in this particular technique. I used to use it as a way to torment my younger brother.
Hahaha.
As well as being lazy I am also prone to obsessions. Particularly with songs. I play them over and over and over until I never want to hear them again. Many of my former housemates can attest to this irritating habit.
Currently these are the songs I am obsessed with. Feel free to copy my playlist and let me know if my technique of bamboozle and distract works for you too.
P's favourite is the last one. Fo' sho'.
My little dog is the unlucky recipient of my musical obsessions - but he loves it when I dance with him.
ReplyDeleteWhat a good little dog. My cat is not a fan. SHe is such a wowser.
DeleteI torture my family with Carpenters music. Very effective. Muahahahaha
ReplyDeleteDemanding creatures, these children, aren't they? I mean they're supposed to sleep for 12 hours a night, and have naps in the day!! Hmph. Then they expect to be fed multiple times a day as well. So rude. But it's okay, because I torture my family with music too. Carpenters music. I am EVIL. Muahahahaha
SO DEMANDING!
DeleteAnother of my favourites is Fleetwood Mac, and P's special favourite is Petula Clark singing "Downtown". We are eclectic that is for sure!
So far Toddler C is not a dancer...and he doesn't seem to get it when I dance.
ReplyDeleteHe listens to Elmo's "Sing What I Sing" on repeat. And I literally cannot stop listening to Alt J...my obsession is probably going on a year now.
I miss the lazy version of myself.
I don't even know what Alt J is - will have to You tube it too!
DeleteI might have to post a clip of P and B dancing on FB or something. It is utterly HIGH - LARIOUS!
Wow! I never realised - but - I must be lazy too! Ha! Our routine is to crank the music up in the play room every morning, I dance like a maniac around them, feed them breakfast dance some more and then exit the room once they are both hyped up and dancing. I then proceed to ingest copious amounts of coffee with a side of honey toast. You and I must be kindred and lazy spirits all rolled into one xx
ReplyDeleteLAZy IN A GOOD WAY LUISA! We are definitely kindred spirits I could have told you that :-)
Deletexx
I'm totally lazy, and I find every way possible to make life easy for myself, in a lazy way, in fact I think you might have just inspired my next blog post (BTW I've been replying on my iPad to all your posts and they don't bloody work - haven't figured out how to do it yet - but I will. I'm also now getting posts delivered to my email so I don't miss them!!! xxx
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