Tuesday, March 12, 2013

My Skin Care Regime.

Ciao fellow fashionistas.

Tonight's edition of the Slapdash Fashion Spectacular is an overview of my very own skin care regime.

This face doesn't just take care of itself you know. I have to put the hard yards in to maintain my apparently effortlessly flawless complexion.

As is my habit, I will present it to you in dot point form, accompanied by helpful pictorial aids.

  • Cleansing - It is important to cleanse your skin. I cleanse my skin. Cleanse is a weird word, isn't it? Cleanse. Means clean. But, like, with extra letters.  Woah, does my voice sound weird to you? Hahahahahahaha...it totally does sound weird! Look at my hands they are so HUGE!  Anyway I use stuff to clean my face.
This is the stuff I use. It's from fancy boutique establishment Woolies. When I'm not wearing makeup I just use water. I know! Novel.
    I use a washer to cleanse my face too. This one has added stains from wiping the baby's face.  I like to think of them as extra nutrients for my skin. Some people pay the big bucks for that gear you know.



  • Moisturising - I mostly don't bother. Sometimes I shove Oil of Olay on. I use whatever half finished tubes and bottles are lying round for my hands and feet. But mostly I can't be arsed.

That's it people! Enlightening isn't it?

Anyway, yesterday's OOTD received an overwhelming response so I am continuing on with today's high fashion costume.

OPI Shorts Story. Chipped to buggery. Forgive me FF for I have sinned. It's been 14 days since my last NP application.


I'm mixing up the bathroom selfies for you. Top and skirt Veronika Maine. Scarf my mum's old one from back in the day. Can you believe I used to wear it as a sort of top arrangement? I wore it today because it has purple on it and my colleague R makes us all wear a particular colour on Tuesdays. Today it was purple. Fascinating, no?


Here I am importantly Taking Care of Business and Getting Shit Done. I was interested to note the development of significant back fat in this photo. Perhaps I need to source some control underwear for my upper body? Any tips for getting rid of it? The back fat? I mean, apart from like, losing weight and doing exercise and toning up and shit. 

My shoes. Also from an op shop.

 There you have it.

Do you have back fat? Do you wash your face? Own any full body control underwear?

I'm dying to know.

21 comments:

  1. Damn, damn, damn - and I SO nearly asked if you wanted 'A Tight Squeeze' (with a bonus pt 2) - the fashionisters guide to control pants!



    ReplyDelete
  2. Hilarious! Just hilarious!
    No to cleanser - just water and soap (dirty word soap I know)
    No to total body control underwear - Yes to occasional straight jacket though - I live in a house full of men, what do you expect?!!!!
    Back fat - yes too much. It keeps the belly fat company!

    Have a wonderful day!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Lou! Thank you for commenting! You use soap!? Practically blasphemy! How do you live with yourself???

      Delete
  3. Estee Lauder, Helena Rubenstein, Elizabeth Arden....and now YOU! These are the kind of tips that will make you into a household name. I will now investigate this cleansing thing you talk about. I think my fur camouflages the back fat.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I too have a lot of (ahem) "fur". Doesn't help me with the back fat unfortunately. Lucky you Sulky!

      Delete
  4. I am quite find of el cheapo brands from Woolies aswell. I'm not forking out $50 for a 10g pot of moisturiser unless that shit is made from gold!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I hear you sister. Did you get your parcel? Tell me you did...

      Delete
  5. Back fat SIGH. Yes. The only solution I can reasonably see for this problem is to stop wearing a bra. But then I'll have to approach everyone backwards I'll be so frightening front-on. Sightety-sigh.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Going bra less seems to be the general consensus back fat wise. This is a problem. Boobs akimbo!

      Delete
  6. That face regime looks a bit complicated. I also struggle with back fat. Find not wearing a bra can be helpful. And takes attention off the other area.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. No bra means trouble round these parts Bron. Big trouble. See my comment above!

      Delete
  7. look at your desk... not a B in sight... you new age brians :)
    (Im trying to talk in code in case you don't discuss your profession online but that sentence just sounds cray now).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Roger that. Um. Or something. You know I'm not a Brian hear days right? Those days are gone my friend.

      Delete
    2. Now if that doesn't sound cray I don't know why does. Try and decode that if you will...

      Delete
  8. No I didn't know you weren't Brian anymore. Bad friend. Are you Adam or Steve now? I am not Brian anymore either. x

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I don't know if I'm Arthur or Martha frankly.

      Delete
  9. How to get rid of back fat? put the fork down, fork? who gets that far more like tie up my hands.

    Seriously I actually think you look slim in thaat photo

    ReplyDelete
  10. smr you are right of course. I've stacked back the few kilos I lost before Xmas. No matter, must start exercising again tho!!! xx

    ReplyDelete
  11. Yes...yes...and YES to all of those questions lol.

    I'm LOVING your fashion posts!

    x

    www.lifestylen.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. HAHA Ez! Everyone seems to answer yes to them all!

      Delete

Vent your spleen! You know you want to.

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