Remembering that this blog is a forum in which to air my hitherto private navel gazings, and in the face of ghastly and hideous instability in the Middle East, I present to you the following diversionary and self indulgent dissertation. Don't read any further if you aren't interested in me, how I look, or what famous people I might look like or have looked like over the years. Or if you are actually interested in developments in the Gaza strip because I'm basically trying to distract myself from that sort of heavy shit. OK.
Over the years people have told me I look like a range of famous people.
At school I worked part time at the local cinema. The year that Madonna's movie version of Evita came out everyone decided (what with my bleached blonde hair and my propensity to wear it scraped back in a low bun) that I was Evita's doppelganger. The manager of the cinema went so far as to encourage me to embark on the humiliating experience of modeling as Evita for a spread in the local rag as a PR stunt, sweetie. The photographer was definitely successful in capturing my youthful double chin, I'll give him that.
A few years later, after I had chopped my hair off, people used to tell me ALL THE FREAKING TIME that I looked like Australian Democrats babe Natasha Stott Despoja.
I kid you not, one time I was innocently going about my business purchasing a CD from JB HiFi (that's right kids we used to have to GO ON DOWN THE SHOPS to engage in this sort of activity) and the shop assistant refused to believe I wasn't the aforementioned Doc Martens wearing political sexpot , or at the very least her ugly younger sister. She made me show her my driver's licence to prove I wasn't before she let me continue with the purchase. I wonder what I was buying? I have no memory of the exact album and can only speculate. Going through my ancient cd collection reveals several possibilities. There's a fair chance it was something like this..
Or maybe this....
Or could even have been this...
OK, so my musical range was a bit limited at the time. Love you Tori. But I digress.
Around the same time I was also accused of resembling that momentarily famous warbler Dido.
I guess Dido and Nat kind of had the same hairstyle as me at the time which, frankly, is where the resemblance ends. I did wear Docs though.
More recently my loving husband, in the days when he was still winning me over with his unique charms, told me I looked like Radha Mitchell.
And finally my Aunt L reckons Nicole Kidman looks like a combination of me and my mum. This is probably the most hilarious one. Mum and I say yeah, if you stretched the bejesus out of the photograph until Nicole was as wide as she is tall. Haha! Dead ringers!
I'm thinking the reality of the situation these days is that the celeb I most resemble would be a sort of Frankenstein creation.
A melange of Suzy Elelman's dress sense...
Angelina Jolie's eye bags,
Katie Holmes' downtrodden posture,
Posh Spice's haircut,
and Kevin Federline's bum,
But I guess this is all academic really, since unless you know me in real life, I am remaining an internet woman of mystery by chopping my own head out of photos.
Do you look like a famous person? Are you a famous person? Do you have a Pob like me?
Over the years people have told me I look like a range of famous people.
At school I worked part time at the local cinema. The year that Madonna's movie version of Evita came out everyone decided (what with my bleached blonde hair and my propensity to wear it scraped back in a low bun) that I was Evita's doppelganger. The manager of the cinema went so far as to encourage me to embark on the humiliating experience of modeling as Evita for a spread in the local rag as a PR stunt, sweetie. The photographer was definitely successful in capturing my youthful double chin, I'll give him that.
 |
| Not me, obviously. I can't find the newspaper clipping, maybe Mum's got it. It's awful anyway. Incidentally, many years later I was to win a free place at a librarianship conference by writing a poem entitled "Don't Cry for Me, Factiva". Those of you in the library know will get the reference. Maybe I am really connected to Evita somehow. [Source] |
A few years later, after I had chopped my hair off, people used to tell me ALL THE FREAKING TIME that I looked like Australian Democrats babe Natasha Stott Despoja.
 |
| The spunky senator doing her thing. [Source]. |
I kid you not, one time I was innocently going about my business purchasing a CD from JB HiFi (that's right kids we used to have to GO ON DOWN THE SHOPS to engage in this sort of activity) and the shop assistant refused to believe I wasn't the aforementioned Doc Martens wearing political sexpot , or at the very least her ugly younger sister. She made me show her my driver's licence to prove I wasn't before she let me continue with the purchase. I wonder what I was buying? I have no memory of the exact album and can only speculate. Going through my ancient cd collection reveals several possibilities. There's a fair chance it was something like this..
 |
| [Source] |
Or maybe this....
 |
| [Source] |
Or could even have been this...
 |
| [Source] |
OK, so my musical range was a bit limited at the time. Love you Tori. But I digress.
Around the same time I was also accused of resembling that momentarily famous warbler Dido.
 |
| [Source] |
I guess Dido and Nat kind of had the same hairstyle as me at the time which, frankly, is where the resemblance ends. I did wear Docs though.
More recently my loving husband, in the days when he was still winning me over with his unique charms, told me I looked like Radha Mitchell.
 |
| I think she was in that Aussie movie Love and Other Catastrophes that we all loved sick back in the day. [Source] |
And finally my Aunt L reckons Nicole Kidman looks like a combination of me and my mum. This is probably the most hilarious one. Mum and I say yeah, if you stretched the bejesus out of the photograph until Nicole was as wide as she is tall. Haha! Dead ringers!
 |
| This pic is from an article entitled "Nicole Kidman Admits Using Botox". You don't say. Although, perhaps Botox is the only thing standing in the way of Mum and I becoming even more like our Nic. I'll get onto it ASAP. [Source] |
I'm thinking the reality of the situation these days is that the celeb I most resemble would be a sort of Frankenstein creation.
A melange of Suzy Elelman's dress sense...
 |
| [Source] |
Angelina Jolie's eye bags,
 |
| OK so I couldn't find a bad photo of Angelina. Here's one of her looking all maternal and shit. [Source] |
Katie Holmes' downtrodden posture,
 |
| From hilarious blog Suri's Burn Book |
 |
| Posh with her bob. Or "Pob". [Source] |
and Kevin Federline's bum,
 |
| Say no more really. [Source] |
But I guess this is all academic really, since unless you know me in real life, I am remaining an internet woman of mystery by chopping my own head out of photos.
Do you look like a famous person? Are you a famous person? Do you have a Pob like me?
Hi Sarah, Aunty Randa here (although don't have identity or profile so am signing off as Anon., which I quite like the sound of). Just wanted to thank you for the many laffs on reading recent entries. Much needed mirth, given I have spent the day watching an ENTIRE series of a Scandinavian crime drama - enjoyable, of course (felt I should do something to mark the fact that I am on hols - 10 hours of tele seemed more appealing than the 3 years' of tax paperwork awaiting me in the 2nd bedroom). But also sick making - but maybe that was the entire packet of chocolate biscuits I ate (in fact, they were ersatz Leibnitz 'Petit Ecolier' ones, bought at your fave super-marché, Aldi. Palazzo brand, I believe. I made the mistake of entering Aldi at Carindale yesterday and exited with a considerable pile of similar produits, but sadly couldn't find the pseudo Mozart Kugeln I'd been seeking. If they have them down your way, you should stockpile them for xmas now...). M xx
ReplyDeleteOoh Randa, I will get me to an Aldi stat to load up on Mozart kugeln, whatever that is, to have it for you for Xmas. I didn't know u were on hols! Lucky thing. Thanks for reading this tripe xxx be lovely to see you on the weekend, will give you a call.
DeleteYour Aunty Randa sounds like a good laugh - it must be in your DNA. I wonder if she was watching The Killing which is Brilliant.
DeleteSulky, Randa is really my sister in law and yes she is a good laugh! And yes I think it is The Killing!
DeleteAt least you've been told that you look like a variety of sexy women! When I was a teenager and cut my hair short my mother burst into tears when she saw me and cried " You look like that weirdo David Bowie!". Given that he was a bloke who was old enough to be my father.....!! No more short hair for me.
ReplyDeleteSulky how awful, you poor thing! And believe it or not, Madonna made up to look like Eva Peron was not the look I was going for as a teenage girl. I think I was aiming for Baby Spice. Fail!
DeleteYou'd need a forehead the size of Mt Rushmore to look anything like Baby (not in my eyes) Spice.
DeleteHahaha!
DeleteDon't Cry For Me, Factiva indeed.
ReplyDeleteStott Despoja is definitely a babe. I'd be taking that compliment and running with it.
I don't think I have a celebrity doppelganger, sadly.
Z suffice to say the Natasha comparison has not been made in recent years, although I do comfort myself with its distant memory.
Deleteat 12 I looked like Raegan from the Exorcist.
ReplyDeleteTrue story.
I slept with the light on and not on my back for years.
Haha! Oh gawd. Scary stuff Kelley! I slept with the light on after seeing Blair Witch Project. And I was about 17. Wussy I know.
DeleteSomeone told me recently that I look like Princess Mary of Denmark... "before she was met Fred and lost all that weight" (that's a direct quote too).
ReplyDeleteOh what charmers, SS! Still that must mean you have lusterous black locks, if so, I am v jealous.
Deletetori amos, love and other catastrophes.... so many memories! xx
ReplyDeleteYes, so many! And I haven't even mentioned Morcheeba while juicing in the kitchen jj!
Delete