Valentines Day. The Slapdash Report - Vol. 2

True to form, I'm exhausted, so I'll make this as brief as humanly possible.

Baby B, the birthday boy himself, has a horrible croupy type cold thing and is (uncharacteristically) causing us no end of sleeplessness.

Anyway, in case you hadn't heard it was Valentine Day yesterday.  Instagram was awash with champagne, red hearts, chocolate, and red roses out the whazoo.  Even I was getting a bit sick of it, and I am a veritable diehard fan of V Day.

I have however brought shame upon myself and my family (although maybe not, actually, seeing as how we are all pretty half arsed and lazy, see my mother's post for details).

I woke up this morning (after a hell of a night with the sick bub) to discover M had bought me a facial voucher from ye olde Ella Bache, along with a cute card with a heartfelt message of love inside it.  Adorbs.

M, however, woke up this morning (after a hell of a night with the sick bub) to discover that I had bought him....nothing.  I know, I totally suck.  I am usually awesome and excellent at making things festive.  I've lost my mojo briefly.  I blame my return to work.  It is taking up important ME TIME.  How very dare it!?

It's all particularly sad and/or amusing, depending on how one might view it, because when I went down to Ella Bache to get the ole eyebrows waxed on Saturday, I had forgotten that I was supposed to have my free facial as well.  Because I couldn't stay, I had to forfeit it.  This pained me greatly.  The ladies were sympathetic and said things like "Oh well, it's Valentines Day this week, you never know your luck!!!".  I scoffed and pooh poohed the idea that M would think to purchase such a treat.  When I got home, I lost no time telling him how the ladies and I had discussed the likelihood of his gifting me in this way and all concluded it was out of the question.

I was proven wrong to my eternal shame.

Luckily I ducked out, dragging the sprogs along, to our local discount alcohol dispensing barn and bought some fancy champers.  M is an understanding fellow.

So, on to the election recap, edition 2.

I've already lost energy re: the election campaign so I'm casting my small and be-holed net a little wider to encapsulate current affairs more generally. Cop out? Yes! Care factor? Nil!

Here's the latest dot points I've shoved together in my inimitable fashion.  You saw it here, um, LAST probably!

- Our leader Joolz and her posse have announced a sort of vague flexible working for parents policy.  I think they're trying to make it so that all parents have the right to request part time work and so forth.  I also have the general vibe that they're thinking of extending this to peeps getting towards retirement age too.

-  The other Joolz, Julie Bishop, noted progressive and radical thinker, responded to the flexible working whatnot by letting us all know ladies can't have it all.  This pissed off some ladies.  I can't imagine why. I totally agree.   I want a ferrari, champagne on tap and a man-slave, but nobody's coughing up.  Is that what's she's talking about? No?  Oh well then, my apologies...

- It's all come out that our sacred Gods of the footy field have been Lance Armstrong-ing it up, druggy growth hormone supplement style.  Whatever.  I couldn't care less but I suppose we have to THINK OF THE KIDS! Won't someone think of the KIDS!?!  Joolz told all the clubs to come forward and spill the beans.  Don't know if they have yet, Google it peeps if you care enough.  I think everyone should just take growth hormones, you know, to even out the playing field and create a race of SUPER HUMAN FOOTBALL MACHINES!  Why not?

They totally are. [Source]

And there ends the Slapdash Report for this week!  Think I missed something important? Probably!  Inaccurate and sloppy? Definitely!

Stay tuned for further updates next week!


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